For this weeks theme on Girl’s talk is about our “FIRST BOYFRIEND”. I was thinking on bailing out on this weeks theme but I decided to share my story ( hahahahha).
As I said before we where not allowed to have any boyfriends not unless we finished college first. After I graduated college my bestfriend at that time invited me to come over to their house . When I was about to go home she told me that we would just drop by at their neighbor since here friends are there. There was this one guy who keeps on babbling his mouth about a certain girl that has a crush on him. I was looking at this guy and I told myself “Kapal naman nito feeling guapo”.I told my friend I really needed to go and so I said my goodbye and went home.
The next day my friend asked me to have a date with his neighbor since I was his type. I told my friend that he is not my type ( very far from what I have imagined to be my first boyfriend – he was dark alright, but short and stout LOL prang teapot –BAD) but my friend insisted that he is a nice guy and he has been like a brother to her. Hesitantly I went out a date with him but with my friend of course… we didn’t even have the same interest but you can see that he is a good person. My friend asked me to get to know him and maybe just maybe we can be more than friends. Our getting to know you stage took about a year.. At one point I told him that he was just not my type and it is better if we just go our separate ways… My friend got mad at me for doing that to her childhood friend… she said I just played him along and I gave him false hope… I felt bad ‘coz it wasn’t my intention. Due to peer pressure I said yes to this guy. He was nice alright but as a young lady who is just starting her working career I dreamed of someone who shares the same desire with me- that is to improve our lives. He is better off than me, his father gave him business to start his life but he doesn’t have interest on learning how to run the business. He always trust his work with his employees thereby resulting to bankruptcy.
I had tried to break up with him a couple of times but whenever I do he would go on his drunken spree and threaten to kill himself. Because he is a mama’s boy his mom would always call me in the middle of the night asking me what I did to his son. I always felt bad and give him another chance but the cycle just go on and on and on. Luckily my mom’s boss asked me if Id like to work here in Saipan naturally I said yes.. my boyfriend at that time asked me to elope with him to avoid having us separate from each other… luckily I used my brains he even asked me get secretly married but at that time I was too young nobody will marry us without parental consent.. I promised him I would come back and by that time when we are both financially ready we will get married.
Being away from him I realized that I deserve more than what I have. I tried giving him a chance to redeem himself but to no avail Oh by the way he was 8 yrs. Older than me… whenever I call him to check up on him he would always be sleeping and that is already around lunchtime whenever I asked him how is his business he would say his sister is taking care of it…. He would talk about marrying me but whenever I asked him where he well get the money to spend on our wedding he would answer “It is easy to borrow money… ill take care of it”. Does he honestly think I would like to start my married life with a huge debt?
At that time being the new girl at work and even on the island a lot of guys would drop hints that they like me most of them would ask me out on a date or just a simple meal. But I wasn’t ready yet to give up on my then boyfriend I prayed that he would learn how to make something out of his life. It is only when I met my husband who was just sheer chance that he went to my workplace. In the months that we have become friends he had been my mentor he would always tell me I deserve better and that I should not feel obligated to stay with my boyfriend just because I fear he would do something to himself and that I would get blamed for it.
In 2002… after almost 3 years with my boyfriend I decided to live for my self and just let go of the things/person that weigh me down. I called my boyfriend and told him it is over I have given him so many chance but through it all he failed me. Again he threaten to kill himself.. I told him although I pray you wouldn’t do that but I too would want to live a peaceful life, whatever you decide to do with yours is up to you and I don’t have anything to do with it. I told him I want us to be friends so that someday when we bump into each other we wont have any awkward moments, but he refused to act like as an adult and be civil with our break up.
He did hurt himself thankfully he just sustained bruises from his car accident… I thought it was over then.. I thought he just accepted the fact that he and I didn’t work out… I was wrong he went on calling my closest cousins to tell her how I ruined his life by breaking up with him… he even made up stories of thing we never did. I called him one time and told him to please at least respect what we had… and to please stop making up stories but he wouldn’t want to. So I just let it go and let him live his pathetic way. I don’t care anymore what he says or does… I’m over him it is just sad that he left me with anger for him… I always thought that we could just both move on and have a happy life…But he chooses not to, after 8 years he still blames me for his mishaps… he still believes and convinces himself that he got unlucky the day I broke up with him..
That is his choice… all I know is that I am happy with my life and I have move on a long long time ago. And I chose to be happy…..
Oh Thank GOD, this is the last topic about our FIRSTS....
This is my entry for Girl's Talk for this week, head on to Niko's nest for more juicy stories about our First boyfriends....Just click on the badge.
you're so brave girl. thanks for sharing your past. God knows who is the best for us and he gave you a good man who is worth loving.
ReplyDeleteOh my. You got lucky you got away from a relationship that is such a vicious cycle. I really dislike people who threaten to end their lives when a relationship ends.
ReplyDeleteoh you are so brave. good thing you choose to be happy. thanks for sharing your story.
ReplyDeleteHere's mine</
oh wow,, congrats for this post.. I don't want people blaming their fate to anybody else. I call it irresponsible. We have our own life to live..
ReplyDeleteOh my i am so sorry to hear all this :(
ReplyDeleteI have a close friend who had to go through something similar too and it wasn't easy for me and the rest of her girlfriends cause that guy even blamed us for telling her to break up with him :/
Some guys are simply crazy!!!!
I hope you won't have to meet anyone like him ever again!
Good luck :))
tsk tsk tsk... long and yet a brave decision to have. Wala talagang mangyayari sa inyo if ever you still together a man without ambition is nothing!!! TAyo pa namang girls isang factor saten ang security right!!!
ReplyDeletecheers for you!!!!
here's mine
http://gorgeousferry.blogspot.com/2010/01/gt-first-boyfriend.html